Why does she just lie there during sex

By Dr. Martha Tara Lee

Have you ever wondered why a woman just lies there during sex? Or maybe you are that woman!

I was recently asked by a man why his female partner just lies there in bed like a dead log during penetrative sex. In fact, this was not a new question asked of me by heterosexual men.

I recall how when I was new to sex, this was what I did — just lie there. In fact, it was what I was most comfortable with. Hence, I’m biased towards women who just lie there. This is a compilation of my own thoughts and opinions as well as of others from an informal poll I conducted through my Facebook wall.

Why She Just Lies There During Sex:
1. Likes lying there
2. Doesn’t know what to do
3. Doesn’t dare to do anything beyond what’s usually happening
4. Trying to focus on being and staying aroused
5. Trying to notice what she’s feeling in her body
6. Fear of pain in other positions
7. Thinks she’s expected to just lie there
8. Remembers him telling her to just lie there (and enjoy)
9. Wants her partner to take responsibility
10. Tolerating what she thinks is nice for him but not nice for her
11. Too lazy to do anything
12. Too tired to do anything
13. Thinking of work (and multiude of other things)
14. Trying to relax
15. Trying to be quiet
16. Trying to have an orgasm
17. Cannot be bothered to do anything
18. Cannot be bothered to please the partner
19. Does not like or enjoy sex
20. Was performing duty sex
21. Was actually performing pity sex
22. Out of guilt/shame — i.e. if she lies there she can’t be doing anything ‘wrong’
23. Bored of sex with partner
24. Emotionally disconnected with partner
25. Disassociated with her body
Can you think of any other possibilities?
The only way to really know is to communicate (and the same will go for men). Without actually communciating with your partner, everything else is anybody’s guess. And we all probably know, there’s really no value in second-guessing.

source: your tango.com