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In praise of the sexy G-string ?

Filed under: Advise Corner,Lifestyle & Fashion |

Ama be straight up in this article so ngoli wama one olo ulafipanga stop reading right here. Turn back because it’s about to get explosive in here.

Ladies, understand that Every man needs this type of panties in his life (panties shown in the picture). These panties would certainly make life worth living for any man. They release stress for any man. I mean who wouldn’t want to rush home when he knows he will find such salvation and heavenly delights awaiting his tired soul?

Why would you rush home when there is nothing to excite you? Ever wondered why most men first go to the bar after work? It’s not football they follow, it’s just that there is nothing exciting at home. Why rush home when you even know the only thing that awaits you are 75 year old granny panties , filya ifi ma bamba fyamu wrestling  fyabena undertaker. The pantie are so old it’s been sworn and patched 5 times na cotton ya black it now looks like a reaped jeans yapa salaula. On top of that nachi half petticoat cha purple icitali kwati elyo bafuma kumushi 

Ifyo tefyo mukwai 

A man needs to imagine the meal at home. Make him miss you, let him crave you like on your wedding night. Ladies have some mystery to you. How are you gonna fight off side chicks and assistants when you are not upping your game? African ladies should learn to invest in sexy lingerie. I mean have time to read some magazines, watch fashion channel and E entertainment TV and catch some trends.

Ala there is no limit to what a man can do for you ladies when you are fully doing the right things for him that drive him crazy. Even batata abo who you think bakaso will reveal all his hidden bank accounts plus give you all the cards and pins once you start driving him insane with your skills. Yes learn new skills and styles. Drive him mad, strip for him, tease him like a bedroom bully. Text him at work “lelo kuleba iyaka kolwe style, mailo yakwa pushi style, ilya day ya mbushi 

Yes He will keep coming home at 12 hours even lying ati work ati nalwala, kanshi mambala just wants to rush home and be with his beloved . Ekatemba chupo ako kene. You don’t need to go ku n’ganga or visit these tuma fake horny prophets who are just as terrible and randy, tu papa twa nyele iyo..

African women are too conservative. Some are even frowning at this post meant to help you keep daddy home. Bambi bale umfwilamo ne nsoni. But am telling you, there is more to it than just showing up naked and laying there thinking you also a 1 million dollar fire truck , my lady you need to be proactive. Ala Side chick temunobe, am telling you the kind of things your men see from your competitors, mamamamama . Imwe busy na kneaker akapala shawelo yakwa baby, side chick ena is in Victoria’s Secret G-string, akatambo kekakeka akapitile fye pataki. And you think shikulu bantu will stay home like a faithful loyal dog ??? In your dreams

Men are crazy, we are hyper, we talk shit all day with our fellow men, we’ve been watching porno from grade 5 in primary school. Every man Occasionally wants to see some of that action once in his life before Baba Jesus calls him to his final resting place and he drops dead. It’s our nature to love craziness, whether niba pastor, priest, or no matter how quiet your man may seem, ilyashi lya sex lyena bonse tuli mashilu. Ask Papa Sikota Wina why at 100 he went for ka gelo ma 30’s . Every son of Adam is born that way (unless you are a homosexual)

So ladies, up your game. Don’t believe those stories ati iyo certain kinds of styles are satanic. Who told you? See where the holy styles have landed your marriage at 

Up your game, for your man be a little whore and slut, penafye. It will breath life in your dead marriage. Do some of those things you see white do on TV. take the kids to their granny for the weekend and just say lelo ilebako. Be wild, explore, make love on top of the stove (just make sure it’s off), in the fridge, do it on the flour, pali decorder, mu bafa, even mu chimbushu. Confuse the enemy, wimupela chance side chick … bapele yonse batata

Napwisha mukwai


Mwaba Mutale


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