Don’t say you love me, when you don’t love yourself first

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By Barbara Mutedzi

A lot of people I come across feel that self-love is being selfish. But it isn’t. Let’s look at it differently:

We can never provide something to another person when we don’t have that within us.

When you say ‘I love you’ to another person, yet you do not take the time to look after and love yourself, is it then REAL LOVE that you are offering the next person or is it watered down, conditional love, that is said through a tinted lens of self-judgment full of dark grey unexciting, self-doubt?

If you are constantly berating yourself and saying negative things to yourself, or even if you don’t – but don’t take the time to appreciate you for being you or your accomplishments; are the compliments you give another person even genuine?

Would you know how the other person feels when you yourself have never felt that way? Everything starts with you. Love you, take the time to be you, then present that authentically to others.

I would encourage you for everyday moving forward, to name one thing you appreciate about yourself and say it to yourself in your car, in front of your mirror, wherever works for you.

Only one thing a day, and if you can get to 10+ a day – even better.

When someone else compliments you, that should be a bonus, because you know you are that already.

Receive it with grace, don’t belittle yourself. Be conscious of how you treat you. You are a precious being.

The more you learn to embrace who you are, the more you appreciate the amount of work it takes to do so.

In turn, the more valuable and well-meaning and even more genuine your compliments are yourself, the more they are when you compliment others.

Make sure you have complimented yourself first when you look in the mirror in the morning before you leave the house.

Be conscious of the energy of you, and be conscious and genuine with the energy you are providing others.

We can only give to others what we have ourselves.

There is only one YOU in this entire universe. No-one else can be you even if they tried. So why not be the best version of yourself right?

The more set your foundation of self-love, self-acknowledgment and self-care; the more you can authentically be for others around you.

Say I love you, like you mean it. It starts with you my friend!

With kind regards, grace and gratitude

Barbara Mutedzi is a life coach


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Start: 2019-07-01 End: 2019-07-31